Not a lot of time for blogging today. Instead, some well deserved humor.
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Kerry Makes Whistle-Stop Tour From Deck Of Yacht
February 18, 2004 The Onion Issue 40•07
LANCASTER, PA—Democratic frontrunner Sen. John Kerry (D-MA) began a seven-day, eight-state whistle-stop tour Monday, addressing a group of Frigidaire factory workers
from the all-teak deck of his 60-foot luxury motor cruiser.Kerry waves down to a crowd of supporters.
"George W. Bush put tax cuts for the wealthy and special favors for the special interests before our economic future," Kerry told the crowd gathered below the starboard side of The Real Deal II. "I will fight to restore the three million jobs that have been lost on the president's watch. It's time America got back to work."
Campaign manager Mary Beth Cahill said Kerry's whistle-stop tour is scheduled to take him through Pennsylvania, Ohio, and on to six Midwestern states at an average speed of 26 knots.
Apart from a brief detour into Lake Michigan between Milwaukee and Chicago, the yacht will travel exclusively on land, attached to a drydock-mounting slip atop a highway-legal flatbed trailer.
Kerry's stump speech, which he delivered through the yacht's PA system, ignored his Democratic rivals and focused instead on the current administration's economic record.
"Bush has the worst jobs record of the last 11 presidents," said Kerry, his hand draped over the flagpole halyard. "Landing on an aircraft carrier doesn't make up for failed economic policy. The American people need jobs to buy food for their families, to secure health insurance for their children, and to pay the mortgages on their houses."
"Unlike the Republicans, I know it's you, the American worker, that keeps this country running," said Kerry, who then tipped his captain's hat to the crowd.
Federal Election Commission records show that Kerry purchased The Real Deal II in December 2003 for $2.5 million. The Kerry campaign's 2003 fourth-quarter filings show that the yacht required $200,000 of work to prepare it for the Midwest campaign voyage. Repairs included a tune-up of the vessel's twin diesel engine, the installation of a Navman color GPS-plotting navigation system, and the addition of red, white, and blue detailing to the yacht's leather interior.
"John Kerry wanted to get out there, connect with the people, and hear their stories," Cahill said in a press conference held in the main cabin. "Taking his yacht across the Midwest is the best way for Kerry to reach out to all the people who lost their jobs under George W. Bush."
"There's no better place to have a good conversation than on the deck of a fine sailing vessel, out there in the sunshine, with the gentle breeze playing in your hair," Cahill said. "It's beautiful up there."
Cahill said she hopes the yacht will appeal to independent voters, who may decide the election in November.
An additional benefit of campaigning in the craft is that it affords Kerry the opportunity to make unexpected stops along the campaign trail, simply by alerting the convoy with his International Maritime Signal Flags.
"What's John Kerry all about?" said Kerry, addressing a small group of supporters that he spotted at a rest stop on Interstate 76. "John Kerry believes in affordable health care, renewable energy, decisive foreign policy, and economic recovery. I'm putting that message on my yacht and taking it all the way across America."
Kerry continued: "We're going to sail The Real Deal II right up onto the White House lawn and tell them, 'The American people have arrived to take back their government.'"
U.S. Sen. Ted Kennedy (D-MA), a Kerry supporter who has been traveling on-and-off with the candidate since January, said that the whistle-stop tour demonstrates Kerry's commitment to the country.
"People tried to write this campaign off last year, but he kept going full steam ahead, because he cares about the proud men and women of this nation," Kennedy said. "He's going to go all the way in November, like the little yacht that could."
posted by Van at 11:18 AM
6 Comments:
Just wanted to say upfront that I voted for Kerry/Edwards in 2004.
I even volunteered for their campaign, but this article was too funny to pass on.
Great T-shirt!
I really felt bad for the Kerry campaign, he was forced to try and walk both sides of a critical issue, now opposing a war (Iraq) that he'd earlier supported. Back in 1998, he excoriated the Clinton bombing campaign over Iraq as "not nearly enough" and suggested a full scale invasion of that country at least be tabled. It was a tough tightrope for him to walk.
One of the big problems the Democrats seem to have had recently stems from their eschewing populist themes. [HINT: touting tax increases as "fiscal responsibility" isn't populism, nor is it practical either, as raising tax rates actually reduces revenues as more taxpayers defer more of their income.]
Kerry was just too patrician, too stilted and too "French" (as his critics called him), not to be the target of spoofs such as this.
The glimpses of his real humor were rare, which is too bad, since he did have a decent sense of humor...Gore was pretty much the same way, perhaps even more stiff and wooden.
The last charismatic populist Democrat to run for President (Bill Clinton) did pretty well. He probably would've won a third term, if he were allowed to run in 2000. In fact, he was the only Democrat to occupy the WH over the last twenty-five years!
Populists (yes, even disingenuous ones) win over policy wonks every time, as proven by both Bill Clinton & G. Bush Jr.
JMK -
"HINT: touting tax increases as "fiscal responsibility" isn't populism, nor is it practical either, as raising tax rates actually reduces revenues as more taxpayers defer more of their income.]"
Well, it depends on how you frame this argument.
But you raise a good point in terms of perception. The Democratic Party is done poorly in regards to framing issues which affect Americans. I'll bet that you do not know the six tenants that the Democrats are running on in 06, do you?
Most don't. I had to go out of my way to find them.
They do not have a good catch phrase either, like, "Contract with America"
The Democrats have very good ideas, but their lack of organization makes them easy prey to the very influential Republican media machine. The Democratic talking points are rarely known, but if the Republicans need to get a message out -- Boom! The radio shows are on it, the blogs are on it, ordinary citizens are calling liberal radio shows - hell, you’re likely to get a flyer in the freaking mail about a specific topic.
The Republicans are well organized, and in lock-step. The Democrats are, in many cases, too independent of each other on the top end.
Time for regime change?
You're right I don't know the six tenants the Dems are running on in 2006.
I'm willing to listen, no question about that, but I'm skeptical of BOTH Parties.
I should never be able to vote for a Republican, as they are the Party of cheap labor and open borders.
Yet somehow, the Left-wing of the Democratic party, which ran both Houses of Congress between 1960 and 1982 taxed and spent the country into near oblivion culminating with Jimmy Carter's Stagflation - double digit unemployment, inflation and interest rates!
I lived through those days and came out of them convinced that the only thing more dangerous than a Country Club Republican was a northeast Left-wing nut, folks who championed "criminal rights," and blamed violent crime on society and who supported racial set-asides and quotas.
The Democrats will have to jetison that group before I'll trust them again. Instead they placate them - the likes of Michael Moore, Al Franken, Cindy Sheehan and others who seem to think that the Carter malaise was perfectly fine.
It certainly wasn't a fine time for working people.
Higher taxes don't help working people, because working folks don't look for government hand-outs. Tax hikes don't raise revenues either because people generally defer (shield) more of their income from the tax bite when tax rates go up.
I'd love to see a Democratic Party in the Zell Miller mold...old, crumudgeon, Conservative Democrats.
You wrote:
"e Democrats will have to jetison that group before I'll trust them again. Instead they placate them - the likes of Michael Moore, Al Franken, Cindy Sheehan and others who seem to think that the Carter malaise was perfectly fine."
How soon we forget. There is some truth to the statement that the more money Congress has, the more it will spend.
But even with the "fiscal minded" republicans, we are dancing close to ecomomic disaster - 500 million bridges to nowhere and hundred's of billions in additional pork spending.
The problem is not endemic to a paticular party, it is human nature to serve our self interests.
There's no silver bullet for pork spending, except an active, educated citizenry.
"There's no silver bullet for pork spending, except an active, educated citizenry." (Van
That is the primary problem inherant to democracies - it's hard for most people NOT to put their own short-term gain over everything else. Even when people are informed, it's often hard to resist personal avarice.
That's why pure democracies are often decribed as "Five wolves and one sheep deciding what's for dinner."
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